“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” – Buddha

Self-love and self-care are terms that sometimes get tossed around, especially as more and more disenfranchised beings are becoming empowered, but what do they really mean?

Self-love is within, not without.

Self-love is completely internal. It cannot and does not derive it’s power from the external environment. No one can make you or convince you to love yourself. Yes, my career is dedicated to showing people how to awaken their self-love, but that’s all I can do. I can coach you how to deprogram and reprogram your mind, restructure self-limiting beliefs, and transform negative energy into positive energy through gratitude practices, but I cannot do the work of self-love FOR YOU. Only you can love yourself; only you can do the real work. I’m here to remind you that you deserve it and that it’s possible for you. You are the one who ultimately chooses to deserve and allow self-love for yourself.

Self-love eliminates the ego mind.

Any falsehood regarding self-love will display egotistical, narcissistic, mind-over-heart tendencies. Fighting and screaming at someone, because you think that your perspective is above or better than someone else’s is not self-love. That’s an example of ego projection. Remember, the ego protects you from everything it perceives as a threat. The ego will make you into a victim of every tiny circumstance. Self-love does not project aggression, fear, doubt, unease, shame, or guilt. If your “self-love” projects these emotions and feelings, please read this article.

Self-love and self-care are states of Being that we can activate at any time.

It’s great to set specific times during the day or the week where you take time to affirm and care for your body and practice presence and gratitude, but please remember that you can bring yourself into a state of self-love and self-care at any given moment. Even in moments when we are stressed out or feeling negatively about our current situation, we can pause for a moment and activate our self-love. When you find yourself in a repetitive, structured thought pattern of worry and fear for the future, you can choose to activate your self-love and remember that the future is not here yet. What you have currently is the present moment, and you can feel total compassion for yourself in that instance, letting go of the programmed fear you were just feeling.

Self-love and self-care are being at home with yourself, not locking yourself away.

As I said before, self-love is completely about the internal. But what we feel for ourselves internally, we will experience in our external environment. When you love yourself, your reality will reflect and affirm that, often bringing in and attracting supportive relationships into your life.

We are social beings. (I will talk about why introversion and extroversion are false personality traits in another article.) We are all social beings, and we all need connections with other people. We aren’t meant to be alienated and isolated. There’s also a big difference between alienating yourself vs. eliminating negative and toxic people in your life. The difference is that when you alienate yourself, you may have the tendency to ignore any effort of discovering new friends or community of positive influences. Usually when you eliminate negative people from your life, you’re differentiating between people who lift you up and those who bring you down. This is making an effort to surround yourself with people who love you as much as you love yourself. But when you completely block yourself off from other people, you are rejecting their love, because you don’t feel you deserve it, or you are paranoid that their love isn’t genuine. If you feel this way, please check out this article.

Self-love is eternal and infinite.

You cannot run out of self-love. If you consider self-love to be the energy that powers your state of Being and your way of life, like how electricity powers the device that you are using to read this right now, self-love has an endless capacity and doesn’t run out of juice. Self-love doesn’t just charge up to 100% and stop, it continues infinitely – it overflows. Self-love also doesn’t run out or decrease in amount or value. It may seem this way, when we put up limits on the amount of self-love that we think we deserve. If you are experiencing a lack of self-love, please read this article.

Thank you for reading today, and I hope this post has helped you learn how to create your own reality with the power of genuine, unconditional self-love. Have a great day, and I know you can create something miraculous.

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